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The
Top 10 Ways To Endorse Your Worst Weakness
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This
piece was written by the late Thomas Leonard,
author, coach, and founder of two schools for
coaches: Coach U and Coachville. For more
information about Leonard, visit
http://coachville.com/tl/thomasleonard/.
The
human tendency is to either ignore, hide, deny,
compensate for or strengthen our weaknesses.
After all they ARE weaknesses, right? And
weaknesses aren't GOOD. Well, until now. The
following Top 10 List makes the case for getting
to love and honor your worst weaknesses instead
of trying to improve them.
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1.
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Your worst weakness may be the fastest way to
accessing the best parts of yourself.
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What
IS your worst weakness? Are you a wimp? A liar?
Insensitive? Impatient? Selfish? A dilettante?
Or worse? Just for now, pick one. If you get to
the 'bottom' of your worst weakness you WILL
find something of incredible value. For example,
if you are a wimp, it may just be that you are a
supersensitive person (which is a REAL gift). If
you are a liar, you may be someone who is built
for a much better life (one that is true to the
lie) than you have now - hey reason enough to
set higher goals! If you are insensitive,
perhaps you are hanging out with the wrong
people and it's time to freshen up the Rolodex.
And so forth. Look for the opportunity in your
worst weakness - not to strengthen it, but
rather what it points to or tells you about what
the next level of your life should probably
include. Weaknesses then can really be great
traffic cops - telling you where to go/focus on
next.
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2.
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What IF you began feeling proud
of/accepting your worst weakness?
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What
IF you began feeling proud of/accepting your
worst weakness?
Hopefully, the comments in #1 above will make
weaknesses sound and feel, well, less 'weak.'
It's pretty common advice today to 'accept' your
weaknesses instead of self-criticizing yourself
for them, or blaming others. However, I am
suggesting that you go a lot further than just
acceptance. Because acceptance implies 'giving
up' or 'giving in.' Endorsing implies more of a
sense of being grateful and proud of your
weaknesses. Wouldn't that be an amazing
evolutionary step for you to feel incredibly
great about your worst weakness? And for folks
to hear and feel this excitement on your part.
Remember, the TRUTH will set you free;
acceptance only heals. Big difference.
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3.
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Focus on your strengths, but include
your weaknesses and THEN delegate them.
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I've
met a lot of clients who get some sort of
satisfaction from improving their weaknesses.
For example, if they are really bad paper
filers, they'll take pride in setting up the
world's best filing system, only to have it
dismantle itself within a month. All that effort
for a short-term sense of 'success.' Oh please.
Better to focus on your strengths to the point
that you can afford to pay others to handle your
weaknesses. I'm really bad with paperwork,
follow up phone calls, dealing with the public
or paying bills, so my Virtual Assistant does
ALL of that for me. Sure, I could MAKE myself do
all this stuff (after all I AM a CPA), but at
what personal, time, emotional, spiritual or
financial or, most importantly, opportunity
COST? Part of being irresistibly attractive is
to become super conductive. How can you become
super conductive if you're forcing yourself to
overcome a weakness? I'm PROUD of the fact that
I'm lousy with paperwork and dealing with the
public. I used to be embarrassed/shamed by this.
But to me, it's now an asset/strength. Make that
leap.
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4.
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Educate people on what you don't do
well, until they fully understand.
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Part
of the process of 'converting' your weaknesses
into strengths is to educate others on the fact
of what your weaknesses are. In other words, be
human. A great quote is: "I'd rather be
hated for who I am than be adored for who I'm
pretending to be." Of course, I'd prefer to
be adored for my weaknesses, but that's another
top ten list! Seriously, here are the types of
things to say to yourself or others about
specific weaknesses: "I'm really bad about
responding to this type of email from someone I
don't know. I need to pass on this."
"I'm terrible with secrets; I gossip. Don't
tell me anything you don't want broadcast."
"Paperwork is the bane of my existence,
which is why I invoice you (a client) by
telephone." "I don't' have the
attention span to take notes of our coaching
sessions, so you'll need to keep track of your
goals and progress." Get the point? I'm not
saying to be arrogant with your weaknesses, but
they really ARE strengths if you let them help
you tell the truth.
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5.
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By knowing what you cannot do and
cannot change, you are freed up to enjoy what
you have that does work well.
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By
knowing what you cannot do and cannot change,
you are freed up to enjoy what you have that
does work well. Taking the path of least
resistance is an important strategy in the
Attraction OS. So is surrendering to what is so.
"What resists, persists" and all that.
The point here is to spend your energy where it
flows and pulls you forward instead of getting
your self-esteem and success by overcoming
limitations or natural preferences.
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6.
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When you can endorse your worst
weakness, you can accept the humanness of
others.
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This
is key. When YOU get to the place where you
see/recognize/accept/endorse your worst weakness
as a strength, you'll be able to respond to
others in a similar way. You'll take things less
personally, and be less affected by the
'humanness' of others. And THAT will really make
you attractive -- to others as well as to
yourself.
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7.
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Your worst weakness can become a
community-network builder for you.
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This
may sound a little unusual, but it's really
neat. What's your worst weakness? How are you
dealing with it? What have you learned? What
other characteristics do you have as a result of
having this weakness? Who else is in the same
boat? The point here is that your weakness may
be the admission ticket to a 'club' of others
dealing with the same thing. And by getting to
know others with a similar weakness, you can get
some of the support you need to turn your
weakness into a strength.
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8.
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Accept/endorse your worst weakness by
realizing how well it's gotten you to THIS place
in your life - and being grateful for that.
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Give
credit to your greatest weakness for how it's
helped you get to where you are today. Write
down a list of 10 very specific ways it has
helped you whether these were (positive or
negative at the time) events, situations,
conditions or relationships that were triggered,
exacerbated or protected (you) by your weakness.
I think you'll find a pretty cool list!
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9.
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Link your worst weakness to your
biggest strength - see the relationship between
them.
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My
biggest weakness is/was that I am WAYYYYYY too
sensitive to other people's energy, criticism,
even their praise. It either disturbs,
devastates or seduces me. I feel that I have no
control over it. Yet, it's also become my
biggest strength: To honor the weakness, I've
had to change my life, my priorities and how I
work. I've become even MORE sensitive in the
process, but now I use this skill/gift to create
cool stuff instead of trying to 'overcome' it.
So, I think it's fair to say that what you might
call your biggest weakness is really your body's
or spirit's way of saying, "Hey, there's
something really great down here, but you'd
better make some changes before I'll let you see
what it is!"
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10.
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Endorsing your worst weakness is just
the beginning of the Attraction Principle; not
the end.
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You
probably understand that this principle is not
about feeling good about saying to someone,
"Hey, this is my weakness; get over
it!" This principle is not a license to be
a jerk, nor is it an excuse not to evolve
through your weakness. Because to truly endorse
your weakness, you WILL need to become 100%
responsible for how affects you, your life and
others. You will naturally want to evolve
through your weakness instead of wearing it like
a badge of honor. That's why the process of
endorsing your worst weakness is just the
beginning of this principle, not the only step.
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